Lewis Reed’s story
Lewis Reed was 18 years old, and he knew his time at Ipswich Town’s academy was coming to an end. It was at that point he decided he wanted his life to end too.
That day, in 2020, is still incredibly vivid in his mind – it is a day that he has never spoken publicly about before. But Lewis has chosen to do so as he continues his recovery, wanting to share his story as part of the new Sky Sports News documentary series ‘Chasing the Dream’.
“I remember what I had for breakfast. I remember going to the ground,” he says. “I remember taking a photo of my boots, before the game, and sending it to mum and dad, saying ‘game day’ – it’s something I always do.
“Exeter at home, all the (academy) boys had been recalled from their loans, from the (under) 23s, and the first team. So I knew I wasn’t going to play.
“The game started, and I was on the bench. I’d been warming up, running up and down the touchline, running like crazy. We got into the second half, and then I looked around and realised I was the only second-year boy who wasn’t on the pitch.
“And then after the game, I was that low and depressed, I didn’t want to go out with the boys. And I’m just sitting there in a corner of the changing room, thinking ‘get me the hell out of here’. Got in my car, just turned the music on.
“And as I leave Portman Road, I just burst into tears, driving home, literally in tears, screaming. And I’m almost having flashbacks of how good my life was, the goals I’d scored, places I’d been.
“I pulled the car over and I was like, ‘I can’t do this anymore’.”
